I think a lot of little girls are shown the “Barbie Dream Home” and get this vision in their head of how they want it to look. Then as we get older, (boys and girls alike) do our best to express ourselves through decorating our bedrooms. Parents try to entertain this, within reason typically, and we get to hang our posters, paint our walls (I did mine with magnetic paint and glitter!), and adorn our rooms with all the quintessential quirky things we “need” and love. As a child/teen though it’s funny because you have limited resources and it’s NOT your home. Mom and dad don’t always WANT you to paint the room or bust down some fixture.
As an adult now, I realized that decorating my home feels like getting to outfit the walls of my very favorite bedroom that I always wanted in my teens (minus the boy band posters) and live this “dream” decor life. I rent, so I don’t get to go tooooo wild, BUT I do enjoy “designing” my space. Especially as I no longer live in a shared space (I spent a lot of my 20s in shared home spaces with roommates and significant others) I have found a diverse and exciting mixture of things I use to express myself and make my home feel like “Home” to me!
Vintage distressed mirrors from Italy on the walls, various art pieces that I love, a pink/fluffy coffee table in the living room, a pink record player, vision boards, pictures of family and friends, floral print things all around and a tent for my bed; these are all just SOME of the ways in which my home is uniquely MINE and I love it.
Having gone through a deep de-cluttering in the last couple years, I have a more balanced space with room to breathe and enjoy. I re-decorate or rearrange the furniture periodically to keep things fresh, or to bust myself out of a funk, but the things that bring me joy are very much ME and I am unapologetic about my home. Yes, it’s probably a bit more feminine in the decor, but I am a woman and I choose that aesthetic. There’s many ways in which we express ourselves, but the space we LIVE in should be one that is SO free and safe.
I find it interesting that when people partner up, they often times just let one half of the partnership do all the “home” stuff (a lot of times the woman) and it’s so odd to me. It’s like by not participating in the process, the “decorating” person is forced into this exhaustive process of trying to guess what the other person likes, and is then hurt when they express displeasure. Then there’s the part where each lose a little of themselves. Yes, I would find a happy middle ground (perhaps a bit less pink if my man lived here), BUT I would firmly say “no, these particular pieces of art are not negotiable and here’s why…” and “I happen to adore my bed tent, so that’s something we need to discuss”. There is a distinct difference between coming to an agreement and someone just not putting in a vote at all.
My home makes me smile, almost at every turn, by the things I see (ok, I have a SMALL place too lol); because those trinkets, pictures, or items are strategically placed to remind me of people, experiences, feelings I want to have or successes in my life. Don’t let others dictate how your environment should be. Design your life purposefully and without apology.